Creationist Arguments You Never Hear

• There is no way that chickens and pigs could have evolved in such a way that chicken wrapped in bacon tastes so good. Only an intelligent designer could cause this phenomenon.
• The human ear is shaped to hold a pencil, and yet the pencil was not invented until millenia after the ear supposedly evolved. Only an intelligent designer could have such prescience.
• There is no evolutionary advantage to spoilt mussels hermetically sealing them to avoid contaminating other foods, and yet they do. An intelligent designer could have made this happen.
• Evolution should have removed all homosexuals from the gene pool by now. Only an intelligent designer could create such sinful and wicked creatures. (His reasons are His own.)
• If mankind has really existed for more than 6000 years, then surely they should have grown out of all this childish "religion" by now? Only a young Earth can explain religion.
• Total morons believe in creationism. Logically, therefore, intelligent people should understand it even better.
• If people had evolved to be good at passing on their genes, they wouldn't have their own children murdered the moment they got the chance to do so. Only an intelligent designer can explain mindless brutality. (Honestly, I wouldn't mind one bit if this kind of crime was punished with the death penalty. The only argument against it is one of "animal cruelty" and the dangerous dogs act sees to that.)

I’ll be honest with you: you might sometimes hear these arguments. I tried, but I’m not sure they’re any sillier than the real ones. I honestly have seen a creationist, apparently quite earnestly, cite some obscure Bible passage and say “go on, explain how that happened”: starting by assuming the Bible to be literally true and from there proving that the Bible is literally true by using the Bible to discount other theories. There’s a redundant step in there somewhere.

If you’ve seen any of these used in earnest, I’d love to hear about it.