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Come Home Billy Bond

June 18th, 2006

Today I happened across a new site. Well, new to me. It’s not actually new, because it already had four exciting adventures!! on it. The site is at willbond.com, and it chronicles the adventures of Will Bond, “the most famous roll of adhesive tape in the world”.

Perhaps at this point I should explain that the site is run by a company that makes adhesive tapes.

In his latest adventure, amply illustrated by badly edited photographs (the ealier adventures are apparently on a lower budget and merely feature bad drawings), he is sent to the Middle East, where he must gain access to a skyscraper to spy on a supervillain. But alas! When he arrives he notices an inferior structural glazing tape has been used on the windows! And while the windows are removed for re-taping, he sneaks in.

Precisely how the roll of adhesive tape then overpowers a supervillain and his goons is left open to interpretation, but I’m sure they’ve got this all worked out.

This is either an incredibly cunning deliberately-naff piece of viral advertising or, far more probably, a really crap execution of a piece of blatant committee thinking from the company that brought you “a whole world of self-adhesive tape”.

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17 Responses to “Come Home Billy Bond”

  1. Gravatar Adam Says:

    I’ve just read it and i will be recommending to all the Hollywood types that i know as a potential new movie!


  2. Gravatar Anonymous Says:

    “Self-adhesive tape”? As opposed to what, normal tape you have to smear glue on the back of to be sticky?


  3. Gravatar Andrew Says:

    Well, you see, we sneer, but just a few days after I posted this someone at work suggested we might need some metalised adhesive tape, and thanks to Will Bond I knew exectly where to look.


  4. Gravatar Paul V Says:

    Self-adhesive as opposed to adhesives you lick, presumably.


  5. Gravatar Paul V Says:

    Self-adhesive as opposed to adhesives you lick, presumably.


  6. Gravatar Stephen Says:

    For some odd reason, Paul, I initially read your name as Paul Five.


  7. Gravatar Mark Says:

    That person who didn’t offer a name must have real trouble with his casettes.


  8. Gravatar SupSuper Says:

    I keep reading “Adhere” as “Ad here”.


  9. Gravatar Andrew Says:

    In fairness, “self-adhesive” ought really be the same thing as “adhesive”, so it is partly tautological. In fact, if anything it’s worse — if sellotape didn’t stick to itself it would be much easier to use.

    But much harder to get on the rolls. Hmm. This is more complicated than I thought…


  10. Gravatar billy willbond Says:

    Life is really like a roll of your tape!
    Stick to your tasks for adhesive’s sake!
    I didn’t know that you put my name on your tape
    At least it’s not a sticky wicket tape debate!


  11. Gravatar billy willbond Says:

    stick to it!


  12. Gravatar Ben Says:

    What?


  13. Gravatar billy willbond Says:

    WHY IN HECK ARE YOU AT APATHY SKETCHPAD USING MY NAME? AND FOR WHAT REASON? PLEASE REMOVE MY NAME FROM YOUR SITES- BILLY WILLBOND CANADA


  14. Gravatar billy willbond Says:

    Remove my name BILLY WILLBOND from your weird apathy sketchpad sites – why and for what reason would you use my name? What a creepy outfit to use someone else’s name without permission – I will be contacting INTERPOL if my name is not removed from your sites forthwith.


  15. Gravatar Andrew Says:

    This is more surreal than a barrel of time.


  16. Gravatar Interpol Ifmyname Says:

    OI. BILLY WILLBOND. WHAT ARE YOU DOING USING *MY* NAME? DELETE YOUR COMMENT IMMEDIATELY


  17. Gravatar heather Says:

    These comments are already surreal enough. The site is even stranger.

    It’s almost the only site I’ve visited in the last 5 years where the pictures are replaced by a “picture missing” icon.

    Padstow, “golfing” in quotes? Am I missing some subtle joke that everybody else got?

    However, I could see spellmagic and numbermagic on an unfeasibly ugly web page but disappointingly don’t seem particularly magic.


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