From the University’s CampusWeb website: “Today: Anti-Racsism Week”
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[?]The new semester started today, with a gruelling two hours of people telling us about electrons. Afterwards, we went into the Viglen Cluster, which as been totally fixed up with computers that work (ironically, I don’t think they’re Viglens any more), and one computer that works less. We know it doesn’t work, because there’s a Sabotage Gnome hiding inside it. We know he’s in there, because we can hear him.
While waiting for Adam, Lizzy noticed a small voice soming from inside the computer behind her. Understandably, this suprised her more than slightly. We couldn’t quite make out what he was saying, but it sounded like “lemon sale,” although obviously that would just be ridiculous. A number of theories were put forward, a small noise device dropped inside the case for a laugh, a Gnome saying “let me out”, the phrase “le m’on sail” being Gnomish for “let me out”, or Alex’ more mundane theory that it was a tiny speaker saying “memory fail”, but what was wrong with a dialogue box, a beep, or a light may forever remain a mystery.
Today I broke with one of my normal policies and watched The Weakest Link. This had little effect other than filling me with a deep desire to write a three-page scathing column about the damn show. Unfortunately, though, I couldn’t think of three pages of scathing insults that would say more about how truly awful the programme is than the following — quite genuine — question which, presumably, is supposed not only to challenge players, but to allow them to make an informed decision about who has the better general knowledge:
“In physics, what is the word for the rate of motion of an object? Va-va-voom or velocity?”
That license fee can’t really last, can it?